Tuesday, July 23, 2019

physical relationship in India

  July 23, 2019    

Is it okay for a woman to have a physical relationship before marriage in a conservative country like India?



Yes it is, but at your own risk.
Important & Related Link:

Is it fine to have sex before marriage?
Your body is your own. You have all the rights to indulge in physical relationship whenever you want, with whomsoever you want. Nowdays its very common and most couples indulge in the same. But having sex before marriage also has its pros and cons.
Pros:
  1. You get to discover your sexuality.
  2. You get to make decisions regarding your body.
  3. Sex is fun. You get to experience it.
Cons:
  1. You run the risk of pregnancy and STDs.
  2. As our country is still taboo in matters related to sex before marriage, its difficult to practice sex without taking risks.
  3. You run the risk of getting caught by your parents which may create a huge ruckus at home and may create trust issues within the family.
  4. Majority of girls in India have sex under pressure from their current boyfriends. They give in to the constant cajoling and demands of their boyfriends. Trust me. 90% of school/college romance never blossom into marriage. So if your guy is asking for sex stating that he will anyway be marrying you , please do not give in and refrain. If he truly loves you even he can wait. Later on many girls have to lie to their future husbands regarding their past.
  5. Sometime sex before marriage shifts the entire relationship power balance. You may end up being forced to continue in a toxic relationship because you lost your virginity to them and now feel trapped.

Sex is a very intimate activity which should be done with a partner of your choosing. Do not rush into things just for the sake of it. Practice safe sex only when your body and mind demands it, never to please someone else's demands. You do not need to prove your love to someone by having sex with them. Do it if you are also into the same mindset and do not care about any long term consequences.


You have all the rights to practice safe sex. But my advice would be to just wait till you are independent and have found the perfect caring partner.


The safest thing to wear before having sex: A wedding ring.


Stay happy, stay beautiful!!!


PS: The views submitted above are my own and I do not force anyone to follow the same. I do believe in individual independence regarding matters like this and that there is no right or wrong in such situations. Everyone has their own outlook towards life and their decisions are in their best interest unless it hurts someone else.


It depends upon the family, she is from. Some women are from orthodox and traditional families. Having physical intimacy before marriage is a taboo.


But 2 mutual consenting adults, decide to get physical, they will get physical anyway. In today’s world, there are lot of options. It only takes a spark, to ignite love and passion in someone.


Some modern girls are high in hormones, and they easily get carried away by such infatuations. The decision to have physical relationship, before or after marriage is upto the women. Don’t compell her, if she is not interested into it.


If she herself, has such feelings for you, then you are lucky!! But having physical relationship after marriage is ideal!! Lucky you!!


No woman is gonna have it in open (India).


So the question is what she thinks about it is more important and not the All India Opinion!


If she is Ok with it, let her go for it. If not, don't do it.


Anyway, this one is personal choice, so don't let others know about it except the party involved in it.


India's young generation mindset is changing and having sex pre marriage is a common happening now India. To confirm, it's enough if you see uploaded videos of love?/F**k sessions on various porn websites. Actors, Actress, producer and director all Indianz.! Only.

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Tuesday, July 16, 2019

Is it fine to have sex before marriage

  July 16, 2019    

Is it fine to have sex before marriage?




look at the analysis to know whether having sex is good or bad, let us have an elaborate discussion to know what reasons every couple cites for having sex before marriage. Some of the reasons are
Few women have admitted that having intercourse before marriage was one of the ideas to make the guy get committed to her. Whereas, the men always have a different opinion where some may real want to share the intimacy and there are few guys who just do to satisfy their lust.
Once when you start to have intercourse, then it becomes a natural habit which may become unavoidable and end up in having it at least two to three times a week. This will not only spoil the intimacy between them but will also break the desire to get into the next phase of life with the same girl.
Some couples also say the reason by blaming the environment and circumstances arousing them to have intercourse and also to make their level of relationship in a comfort manner.





ADVANTAGES OF HAVING SEX BEFORE MARRIAGE:

Let us now see the benefits we can gain by having sexual intercourse before marriage life.
The chemistry between the couple at the time of sexual intercourse is usually said to have increased. It not only creates an understanding between the two but also creates a good mutual respect between the couples. Still, it might be advisable only to have intercourse occasionally as making it a regular practice before marriage will surely lower your interest.
Some people prefer to have intercourse within the same gender before marriage and this is a denial scenario since it may make the person to lose interest of having the intimacy with the opposite gender. They will not have an experience or a feel of having intercourse with opposite gender and it automatically sets their mind to deny them even after their marriage.
The ultimate advantage is you can clearly get to know each and every proceedings of bed step by step and you actually start to enjoy and co-operate with your partner which always makes you feel so excited and anticipated.
You can clearly note your partner inch by inch physically and may be tempted to explore more and more about your partner. In this way it is very much helpful in noting down the actions and behavior of your partner which would prove handful even after the marriage.
Some may have problems in fulfilling the desires of their partner while the other may get fulfilled very quickly. To best avoid this problem, having intercourse before marriage will surely help you a lot. Once if you find either you or your partner is not able to fulfill each other , you can follow practicing some remedies to get fit enough and give the libido your partner wants.




DISADVANTAGES OF HAVING SEX BEFORE MARRIAGE:

Similar to the benefits, there are also some major disadvantages of having sexual intercourse before marriage. They are
Based on the recent study, it has been revealed that man y women have lost their interest in having sexual intercourse with their partner after marriage as they have got fed up and tired of having intercourse with the same partner even before marriage. In some cases, there are also some males who have witnessed the same issues very frequently.
Having intercourse before marriage may give them the attraction and physical fulfillment at the moment but it won’t last long. The reason being that men always think that this just a part of relationship whereas the women think that they have given their entire life to the guy and become more close to him. In such cases when there is nothing more left in the relationship to be carried further, there are heavy chances of breaking-up, being a possibility.
Also many women lose interest of having sexual intercourse after marriage with her partner just because of the myth that was created in her mind that intercourse will only lead to the fulfillment of individual on their own rather than the love and intimacy which is to be shared in the bed with each other. This is mainly because of her previous experiences at the time of her relationship.
Whenever there is relationship between the men and the women before marriage which gets further through the sexual intercourse will get a feeling of individual’s joy and pleasure on their own at the end of intercourse. The reason being the libido and the intimacy that was shown at the initial phases of first few weeks of intercourse will totally get changed into a entirely different one which has the desire to get fulfilled by the individual’s on their and get their due disrespect and opinion towards the sexual intercourse even after the marriage.
There are also several health related issues which may occur during premarital sexual intercourse. There may be problems during the period of life after marriage such as loss in erection, getting fulfilled quicker than usual and several other similar issues that are related to intercourse which occurs either before or after marriage affecting your future marriage life.

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Monday, July 15, 2019

Is having sex before marriage bad for girls

  July 15, 2019    

Is having sex before marriage bad for girls?









Important tag: marriage, sex, adult dating and relationships, premarital sex
When you get married, something very magical will happen and you will end up married ever after if you were a virgin up to your marriage. Well, that’s what society used to tell girls to prevent them from becoming pregnant. Make marriage sound special and tell them bad things will happen if they have sex before marriage and most of the girls will keep their virginity and even in some societies would prefer death over sex before marriage. (Actually, girls who were about to be raped would rather kill themselves to protect their virginity.)

But in reality, billions of people in the past had sex and had normal lives even without marriage. Marriage is actually a reasonably new thing that was usually something for people with a high status. Kings would marry as the marriage would result in alliances with other families, resulting in more power for the Royals. But the normal people on the street would just have relations without the official approval of marriage.




Interestingly enough, marriage was very profitable for Christian Churches by demanding that you’d only have sex if you were married. And marriages would have to go through the Church so the Church would earn extra money as you’d had to pay to be married. Plus, the Church got more control over the lives of their followers, making them more powerful.
So, marriage has always been a method to gain power by the people involved in it. And because of the expenses, it was hard to get married and thus have sex so it was also a mild form of birth control. But societies change and so did the meaning of marriage.

Nowadays, marriage is considered to be nothing more than a contract between two people who love one another. There are still marriages for other reasons but most get married because two people want to live together as a single, economic entity. This means they could inherit from one another, share bank accounts and other stuff and basically get their personal caretaker as your partner will be considered to be your caretaker if something happens to you. And as it’s just a contract, it also tends to be broken regularly but still, a contract is a contract.


Nowadays, marriage is an option for many couples all over the world and not exclusive to straight couples anymore. This means that lesbians like me also can get married, if we want to. And if I find a nice woman who I love and who loves me and we want to spend our lives together then I can get married to her.


But this contract sets no rules anymore about sex before, during or after marriage. In the marriage vows, you can add some additional promises like never cheating on your wife but it’s not a requirement anymore. Open marriages have become an option and sex before marriage has not become a problem anymore in modern societies.

The only situation where it still matters is within religion as even today, marriage is used by religions to control the lives of followers. So if you are religious then you probably can’t have sex before you’re married. Then again, people still have to find out that you had sex before marriage. That’s not an easy thing to do.

Besides, does lesbian sex still count as sex? Say, two women are having sex with one another. Would that count? Or two men having sex together? Does it matter what kind of sex it was? Just touching? Oral, Anal? Full intercourse?

If you don’t want others to control your life then sex before marriage is just fine. Doesn’t mean you have to have sex before marriage. It just means that you can have sex before marriage if you want to…


Women who give away their best assets to men who give them nothing other than sex are most of the time the gullible and weak kind, they are not able to defend their own interests. This weakness is often displayed in various other forms which you can read and potentially guess the number of sexual partners they have had with surprising accuracy.

Sex for a woman is as much an emotional activity as it is physical. It is nature’s potent glue that can create superb bonding with the male partner. Promiscuous women, or the weak women, are often forced to gradually teach their brains to let go this powerful bonding action. Soon enough, sex is no longer a special act for them; no big deal. It’s just like going shopping for them. Sex becomes an absolute necessity and by virtue of being a woman, they will easily find it in abundance - whenever they want, as much as they want. This might sound like a fun and happy place to be in, but it’s actually more like being cooked on a slow flame and not realizing it until it’s too late.

So, having sex in a committed relationship is as good as having sex in marriage. But, then again, a strong and emotionally stable woman will not get to have more than 3–4 relationships before she ends up finding the love of her life. A weak woman will have gained 20–30 sexual partners before she will finally have to force herself to get married to the same kind of man that she had been rejecting since attaining puberty

it happen hundreds of times when I had sex with both of my now ex-wives before I married them. It was really good too! There's no way I would have married them had I not known whether or not we were sexually compatible. I kind of dislike the the comparison to test driving a car because it puts potential spouses up as property or a purchase. But ignoring that part of it, the comparison is kind of accurate. Ladies, would you buy a car that looked nice without driving it? 


Please comment your answer

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Sunday, July 14, 2019

Intimacy Before Marriage: It’s More Than Just Sex

  July 14, 2019    

Intimacy Before Marriage: It’s More Than Just Sex



I’ve written at length on the blog about why we should wait until marriage for sex, and why God made sex just for marriage.

But sometimes I fear that in all of our talk about saving sex for marriage we forget that the biggest sexual temptation isn’t always a physical one. Intimacy before marriage isn’t only about sex.

And so I thought today I’d share the BIG ISSUE that often causes couples to fall in the area of sexual temptation.

Here’s the scenario: a couple decides they want to wait until marriage to have sex. Yay! That’s all very good. And so they sit down and they talk a lot about boundaries. Will we kiss? If so, for how long? 10 seconds? 15 seconds? Can we kiss on the neck, too? What about hands? Where can they go? Just on the back? Nothing under clothes? Can we ever lie down together? Can we snuggle on a couch together? Etc. etc. etc.


We tend to think about intimacy before marriage in these terms:
Physical Intimacy = Bad
Emotional Intimacy = Good
Spiritual Intimacy = Very Good!

What are we doing here? First, we’re portraying physical intimacy as a bad thing–it’s dangerous!–which often does a real number on women once they’re married, because it’s hard to flip that switch once you are married and start to see sex as a good thing.




But we’re also turning sex into entirely a physical thing, and forgetting that it is so much more than that.

We’re actually cheapening sex.

I don’t think there’s anything wrong with praying together before you’re married. In fact, I think it’s a very good thing! We need to know that we can pray together and have a spiritual life together.

But here’s the thing we also have to know:

It is precisely WHEN we are praying together that we are most likely to fall sexually. It is WHEN we are spiritually and emotionally close that we are most likely to experience real sexual temptation.

And all of this applies especially to girls.

Many girls can “turn off” the sexual cues they get when they’re kissing, and can resist. We know that we’re not going to have sex before we’re married, we decide that in our heads, and we don’t let it go too far.

But when you’re praying together and feeling close, all of a sudden those sexual feelings will come on, full blast, when you didn’t really expect them. And if you, as a “good Christian girl”, have drawn up all of these physical boundaries, and have been concentrating on spiritual and emotional intimacy, you may be very surprised when all of a sudden you find yourself in a compromising situation you never dreamed of.



So what am I saying? That we shouldn’t be emotionally or spiritually close?

No, I’m not saying that. Here’s what I’m saying:

Intimacy is a wonderful thing, and intimacy in its fullness is meant to be experienced only in marriage.

It is wonderful to start to feel intimate before you’re married. But be aware that sexual temptation is often far more tied up in emotional and spiritual intimacy than it is in sexually “fooling around”. If you draw all kinds of lines that you “will not cross” physically, but fail to talk about what’s going to happen when you’re praying together or sharing deep memories or crying together and all of a sudden you feel tremendously drawn to each other, you’re likely setting yourself up for a fall.

Certainly talk about what you want to do physically, but I think a better conversation to have is this one: we are going to feel really drawn to each other the closer we get–closer in every way, not just physically. So let’s just set some boundaries like we won’t be in each other’s rooms late at night, or we’ll try not to hang out in an empty house too much, or we’ll have a friend that we text constantly for accountability.

The root of temptation is often not sexual, and if we make everything into something physical, we set ourselves up for inadvertent failure (and a whole lot of shame), and we also don’t present the full picture of who we are sexually.

Does that make sense? Let me know in the comments if this is something that you experienced when you were dating/engaged. When did you feel closest? How did you handle boundaries?

1. Ketsia

Everything you said is TRUE Sheila! It’s when we got engaged that we found ourselves constantly having to reset our boundaries (and ask God for His forgiveness). Because what were we doing while engaged? Talking about the future, reading books on marriage together, opening up about the past, etc etc. It naturally follows that spiritual and emotional intimacy will lead to physical intimacy. So yup, you’re spot on!

2. Emily





I have watched people struggle through long engagements (up to 2 years in one case!) and I’ve nearly never seen a compelling reason for them to be waiting.
So mostly we coped by having a really short engagement.
Four months.
Just long enough to plan a wedding and find a place to live.

3. Rebecca Lindenbach

Yep that’s what we did, too–6 months for us because we were in school and wanted to wait until we had been together 18 months before we got married (psychology research on love and all).

I think we shame people too often for getting married quickly–as long as they’re going towards the decision with wisdom and lots of prayer, quick engagements really don’t seem like a problem at all to me–and actually seem pretty biblical when you read 1 Corinthians 7!

4. Lillian

It’s a huge struggle and strain on my relationship as well. By the time we get married will have been a 6 year engagement (counting from when we know for sure we would get married). I honestly think It’s the strength of God that’s been keeping us from becoming too physically intimate before marriage.

5. Lyndall Cave

This article made me flinch, and not in a good way. As a teen I was steeped in a Purity Culture that was just as concerned with emotional purity as physical purity. That meant no feelings about guys. Period. No dreaming, no media with romance in it, and definitely no crushes. I thought my feelings were evil and my heart was a wild monster I had to beat into submission. I was a very emotionally repressed teen, which is NOT helpful for good mental health.

Anyways, I think there’s a huge difference between “Don’t have crushes because that’s emotionally impure and you’re on your way to sin” and “emotional and spiritual intimacy leads to a greater closeness and attraction between people” as a fact of life. Because of my past, I read most of the article in the tone of the former, hence my flinching. But I really appreciate the comment that greater spiritual intimacy does make physical intimacy more desirable.

Our goal in life is not to avoid sin. Our goal is to love God and love our neighbour as ourself (which means that we don’t want to sin anyway). I wish we as Christians focused less on telling people what not to do, and more on how to love and be loved

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How Long Couples in Lasting Relationships Should Wait to Start Having Sex

  July 14, 2019    

How long couples in lasting relationships should wait to start having sex, according to science



  • For new couples, moving too fast or too slow when it comes to getting physical can be a big worry.
  • Many people wonder when the best time is to start being sexually intimate in a relationship.
  • The answer is complicated, spanning anywhere from a few dates to a few months after beginning to spend time together.

Valentine's Day is coming soon, signaling a romantic milestone for many couples. But for some new pairs, the worry that your relationship is moving too fast or too slow can become a major concern.




Which got us wondering: When is the best time to start being sexually intimate in a relationship, according to science?

The answer is complicated, spanning anywhere from a few dates to a few months after you start to spending time together.

One of the reasons it's hard to determine the best time in a relationship to have sex is because there hasn't been a lot of research tackling that specific question. Few studies have looked at the health of a relationship as it relates to when couples first had sex, and the research that has been done mostly features specific samples of people — mainly college students or married heterosexual couples.




But here's what we know about commitment and sex

In the early 2000s, Illinois State University communications professor Sandra Metts performed a study to find out whether having an emotional connection — in particular saying "I love you" before having sex — could have a positive impact on a relationship.

Her study of almost 300 college-age men and women found that it did.

In fact, Metts' results suggested that couples who had sex first then said "I love you" after had a negative experience: The introduction of that conversation was often awkward and apologetic.

Rachaphak/ShutterstockMetts' study provided a list of classic steps partners should take before they get physical, though it's not a clear indicator of the exact timing to have sex. The list includes getting to know the person, sharing a first kiss, then building up to an expression of commitment.

That emotional connection is one of the key elements of any relationship, psychotherapist Toni Coleman told Business Insider in 2015.




Having a good level of communication and an understanding of where the relationship is headed also helps ensure the experience will be positive, she said.
Barton Goldsmith, a psychotherapist from California, agreed that being on the same page emotionally is helpful for finding the best time to start having sex.

"The most important thing is you both agree not to push," he previously told Business Insider. "Be clear that the person is comfortable."

In other words, it's best to wait at least until you're comfortable with each other and have a better picture of what each person wants in the relationship. But when it comes to how much time that takes, it depends.

Here's what three different researchers have to say:

Option 1: Give it a few weeks

According to Goldsmith, a total of 36 hours spent together is all it takes to be ready. Those hours doesn't have to be consecutive, he said — it could be a dinner date plus a weekend afternoon spent together, and so on, until the hours add up. For most people, that would probably take a few weeks.

If a couple waits much longer than that, he says, the strong desire to have sex may begin to subside. There's data to back him up — a 2012 study on sexual desire found that after the beginning phase of a relationship, sexual desire can drop.

Option 2: Hold off for a few months

Harry Metcalfe/Flickr Based on the findings of several studies, Coleman suggests that at least three months into a relationship — or when it's clear the honeymoon phase is over — is the best time to start having sex.




The honeymoon period is the first few months of a new relationship, when feelings of attraction are intense and it seems as if the person you're with can do no wrong.

"You move past that, and your feet are more on the ground," Coleman said, adding that [ Metts' study] suggested the couples who "waited until that level fared a lot better than people who had sex on the first, second, or third date."

Goldsmith disagrees, though — he thinks the time after the honeymoon period is too late.

Option 3: Wait until marriage

Some people's religious beliefs dictate that they wait to have sex until after they get married. There isn't much scientific research about how this practice impacts a long-term relationship, however.

In 2010, Dean Busby, the director of the school of family life at Brigham Young University, performed a study that suggested that the longer you delay sex — especially if you wait until marriage — the more stable and satisfying your relationship will be. But Brigham Young University, which funded Busby's research, is owned by The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, which isn't a fan of sexual intimacy outside of marriage.

That said, Busby's study built on a bit of earlier research, including one observational study that looked at data from the National Survey of Family Growth. Those findings suggested that women who had one or more intimate relationships involving sex before marriage were at a higher risk of divorce later down the line. But again, the evidence to support that claim is very limited.

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Friday, July 12, 2019

Physical and Abstaining From Intimacy Before Marriage

  July 12, 2019    

There are several pros and cons of physical intimacy before marriage





When it comes to physical intimacy before marriage, faith has a lot to say about what boundaries an individual should set. Most religions suggest or expect that you keep yourself pure before the big day. While those who do not follow a faith, or at least not strictly, seem to be in favor of engaging in physical intimacy before marriage.

So if you are somebody who is not influenced by a particular faith, and who has a neutral perspective on physical intimacy before marriage, you might find it interesting to explore the reasons why some save themselves for the big day and the reasons why others explore their sexuality before marriage.

Pros of Physical Intimacy Before Marriage


1. Establishing sexual identity
If we do not explore our sexual side, we cannot grow naturally and develop into it, and that means that we cannot truly understand where our sexual identity lies. Many people do not discover their sexual orientation until they have sex and realize that they are perhaps not naturally attracted sexually to the opposite sex. It is an important thing to figure out before marriage!

2. Developing sexual experience


You are considering marriage, and settling down, you wouldn’t marry somebody who is too childlike, or naive at life. So it makes sense to explore ourselves sexually. So that by the time things start to get real, you’ll be confident enough in yourself and in your understanding of your sexual side without having to go through the pain of practicing all of this on the person who you consider to be the real deal!

It makes sense to explore ourselves sexually

3. Assessing sexual compatibility


It’s not unusual to be in a relationship and to be physically attracted to your partner, but then to end up being completely turned off when things become physically intimate. Perhaps biology is telling us that we are not compatible, who knows. But as strange and frustrating as it may seem, that problem occurs more frequently than you might assume.

If you are physically intimate with your partner before marriage, you’ll know soon enough whether you are attracted to each other sexually so that you can make a well-educated decision about whether to marry or not.

Let’s face it, while marriage requires more than physical intimacy alone; physical intimacyis an essential component of a marriage that requires effort and attention. Avoiding physical intimacy in marriage because of an issue with a lack of sexual attraction will potentially create a distance in your marriage that can be difficult to come back from in some situations. Discovering your sexual compatibility beforehand can help to avoid such problems.

4. Identifying sexual problems


There is a myriad of sexual problems that can occur. Some might be fleeting, and others might require time and effort to resolve while others could be permanent. It would make more sense to see how you work through such problems before marriage so that you don’t spend your married life dealing with such issues, instead of enjoying a beautiful relationship.

"It would make more sense to see how you work through such problems before marriage"

Pros of Abstaining From Physical Intimacy Before Marriage

1. Encourages a stronger relationship

When a couple starts to become physically intimate with each other before they have taken enough time to get to know each other, it can lead to an undercurrent of problems. The focus of the relationship is likely to shift away from a loving relationship and toward a sexual relationship instead.

Without a stable platform, sexual energy is powerful and can be all-encompassing. So, in some cases, a relationship can develop into one that is only focused sexual activity. The shift in focus causes problems in the development of a stable relationship.

At it’s best, this situation delays the bond building between two individuals, which may distract you from focusing on meeting and investing in the right person for you, for the right reasons.

At it’s worse, you’ll find yourself in a one-dimensional relationship that will never be entirely fulfilling, or is likely to end when the fascination of the sexual attraction has died down.

Sometimes delaying sexual indulgence encourages a stronger relationship

2. Encourages generosity instead of selfishness


Sexual intimacy without the bond and commitment of friendship can become a selfish and sometimes hedonistic act, which will then evolve into the style of the relationship.

This shift in relationship style can occur because time hasn’t been taken to get to know and love each other for who you are as individuals. Instead, the focus has moved to relishing in the sexual chemistry only.

If the sexual chemistry is the only foundation for a relationship, there will be times when insecurity will develop as one (or both) partner(s) start to become bored with the one-dimensional nature of the relationship. Insecurity can also grow if one partner becomes unconsciously aware that the relationship isn’t balanced, fulfilling, or stable enough to go anywhere.

Insecurity can lead to jealousy and biased thinking that is almost always selfish but is only that way because it has arisen from a selfish relationship style.

3. Makes breaking up cleaner

OK, so we are talking about physical intimacy before marriage, and marriage does not mean breaking up. But it takes time to find that person that you want to spend the rest of your life with.

If you have had a physically intimate relationship with somebody without taking the time to get to know them, it can be difficult to break up, and can also be damaging to your sense of self and your esteem.

Physical intimacy brings complex emotions and energy into a relationship, which involves a couple who are not yet in love and not yet committed to each other. We’ve already alluded to the selfishness that can occur, and the poor communication that will also be present. But to make yourself vulnerable to somebody, who isn’t on your side will lead to a sense of rejection and of not being good enough. It can also cause somebody to feel like they cannot break up because the physical intimacy has already been present.

If you were not engaged in physical intimacy before marriage, all of these complications could be avoided, and you’ll end up dealing with the powerful sexual energy with somebody who is wholly committed to you and on your side. Which is a much more empowering relationship to have.

Want to have a happier, healthier marriage?





If you feel disconnected or frustrated about the state of your marriage but want to avoid separation and/or divorce, the marriage.com course meant for married couples is an excellent resource to help you overcome the most challenging aspects of being married.

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Thursday, July 11, 2019

27 Sex Facts You Need in Your Life

  July 11, 2019    

27 Sex Facts You Need in Your Life
This is not your high school sex education class.

 Even if you consider yourself a total sexpert, there is always something new to learn about sex. From all the crazy ways it can improve your health to the downright weird things that happen during the act, read on for everything you could possibly want to know about getting busy. Plus, we promise it will be a lot more fun than sex ed ever was. 

1. Sex reduces stress. On top of obvious, ahem, physical benefits, research shows that getting busy calms nerves, lowers blood pressure, and reduces stress. Grab your partner before that big presentation at work—in one study, participants who had sex before a public speaking experiment were the least stressed.

Take our survey to help us learn more sex facts that we'll share in an upcoming issue!

2. It can make you feel better when you're sick, too. Studies show that arousal and orgasm boost your immune system. And while this means sex could be good for you when you're feeling a little under the weather, definitely know when to opt for some chicken soup and some sleep over a little sexual healing.


3. Lube makes it easier to orgasm. If you're having trouble getting off, all your problems might be solved with one simple addition to the bedroom: lube. Nearly 50 percent of men and women who used lube said it made it easier to have an orgasm, according to a study out of Indiana University's Center for Sexual Health Promotion. Easiest sex hack ever.

4. Speaking of lube, you can use coconut oil for that. If you're a health buff, chances are you already know that coconut oil can be used for just about everything. Another thing to add to the list of its many functions: a great DIY lubricant. It's all-natural, long-lasting and even anti-fungal. Who knew?

5. Lesbians have the most orgasms. Sorry, straight ladies—when it comes to crossing the finish line, lesbians are coming in first. A study that looked at the relationship between sexual orientation and orgasm occurrence found that heterosexual women climaxed 61.6 percent of the time, while homosexual women climaxed 74.7 percent of the time and bisexual women climaxed 58 percent of the time.







 6. Other random characteristics can up your orgasm odds, too. Who else joins lesbians on the list of those having the most orgasms? Red heads, Republicans, Android users, and older women, to name a few.

7. Semen is low in calories. Thirty-six calories in a teaspoon, to be exact. Just in case that was a concern of yours.

8. Post-gym is a REALLY good time to get busy. Blood flow to your genital region is higher after a workout, according to one study, making your sexual function go off the charts. Not to mention, your testosterone levels skyrocket while you exercise, so you'll definitely be in the mood.

9. Speaking of working out…some people get off WHILE doing it. Orgasms are elusive enough as it is, but some lucky people report exercised-induced ones. They can thank repetitious core movements for that one—and some serious good fortune.

10. Some states are kinkier than others. Wyoming, Alaska, Vermont, West Virginia and Oregon are the top kink-curious states—at least according to what they search on Pornhub. California, surprisingly, came in dead last—but maybe they're expressing their kink outside their search history.





11. Almost 31 percent of guys have faked an orgasm. A survey from Time Out New York found that guys are in on the trick, too. Time to start second-guessing everything you thought you knew.

12. Love makes for better sex. A recent study presented at the annual meeting of the American Sociological Association found that the most mind-blowing sex comes with being in love with your partner.

13. Condoms don't actually affect pleasure all that much. Next time a guy complains about using a condom serve him up this study that found men and women enjoy sex just as much with condoms as they do without. In fact, condoms might even make sex better, thanks to new, pleasure-enhancing innovations.

14. Traveling is prime time for one night stands. HostelBookers.com surveyed over 11,000 of its users about their "juiciest travel sex secrets" and found that a whopping 52 percent of men and 41 percent of women have had one-night stands while traveling. Get it, world travelers.

15. Hooking up can lead to marriage. You might think that hooking up and settling down are mutually exclusive, but it turns out that one third of married couples were originally a hookup, according to a report from the National Marriage Project. Okay, so every one night stand might not be marriage material, but hey—don't count out the possibility.





16. Nipplegasms exist. Add this to the list of crazy orgasms you probably can only dream about. But here's how it works: Nipple stimulation releases oxytocin, which can cause the uterine and vaginal contractions associated with orgasm. This brings more blood flow to the genitals and, for some lucky women, that can mean an orgasm.

17. Sex can lead to more regular cycles. If you have period trouble, sex should be on the top of your list of cures to try (okay, barring consulting an actual doctor). Researchers at Stanford and Columbia Universities found that women who had sex at least once a week had more regular cycles.

18. You feel less pain during sex. Ever wonder why things like spanking and hair-pulling go from bad pain to good pain when brought into the bedroom? That's because your pain threshold can increase significantly during arousal, according to a study published in the Journal of Sex Research.

19. One in 5 people use their smart phones during sex. Yes, you read that correctly. During sex. At least, adults between 18 and 34 years old do, according to a survey by Harris Interactive for Jumio. Here's hoping that they weren't using their phones to live-tweet.

20. Sex is a great addition to your regular workout. You've probably heard that sex is a great form of exercise—and then heard that fact debunked. Okay, so you won't be shedding any serious weight on a fitness routine of sex alone, but Canadian researchers found that the level of intensity during sex was practically two-thirds that of exercise. AKA, the perfect supplement to your usual workout.

21. More people prefer coffee to sex. Researchers conducted the survey of over 7,000 and found that 51 percent of them said they could go longer without sex than they could go without coffee. Clearly those people don't know that orgasms can be a great morning pick-me-up, too—or maybe they just really love their Starbucks. (We understand.)

22. People in New Mexico are having the longest sex sessions. Spreadsheet, a relationship app created to help users monitor their performance in the bedroom, ranked states by their staying power between the sheets. The states with most stamina: New Mexico, West Virginia, Idaho, South Carolina, and Missouri.

23. You can induce sex dreams by your sleep position. If you're not dreaming about Channing Tatum as much as you'd like, you might want to switch up how you sleep. found that people who slept face down on their stomach with their arms stretched above their head had more sexual dreams—including ones about affairs with celebrities. Bring it on.

24. Socks might be the weird key to your orgasm. Okay, maybe socks won't magically trigger an orgasm, but they do solve a common orgasm-blocking problem, according to a Dutch study. While measuring orgasms, they found that many of their female participants were uncomfortable due to cold feet. After they gave them socks, the percentage of those reaching orgasm rose from 50 to 80 percent.





25. It may cure your headache. Before reaching for that pain reliever, you might want to try an all-natural approach. One study found that 60 percent of migraine sufferers reported that sex helped ease their pain. Yep, it's that good.

26. An apple a day can boost your sex life. According to one study, women who ate the fruit once a day had higher sexual quality of life. Plus, apples are delicious, so it's a win-win.

27. Having an orgasm can make pillow talk better. Well, obviously. But research actually found that post-sex communication is more intimate and open if you climaxed. We call that motivation.

All gifs courtesy of giphy.com

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